People say the fruit doesn't fall too far from the tree. Well, I strongly disagree. Not only can the fruit roll away very very far, it is highly possible that an apple tree might sprout up an orange! No, I am not talking botany or wonders of modern science here. I am talking about how different children can turn out to be from their parents despite all the influence, attention and patience lavished on them.
Especially in this generation, I think parents only manage to make an impression on their offspring till the time they are not exposed to the outside world. Once they are out and about - maybe since their play school years, the impact of new, shiny things like friends, celebrities, characters from books, people they find cool, television and mobile phones can supremely overpower any work a parent might have done to ensure their child grows up to be a good kid. Poor parents are left with about 3 years to teach their kids all about morals, rights, wrongs and to teach them in a way which the kid remembers for all her life. Now, who really remembers anything from when they were under 3 years?
So is it right to blame moms and dads for the wrong doings of their kids? We can say the same about the good stuff too but then, parents totally deserve all the accolades for their child's achievements because notwithstanding the eventual impact of their efforts, parents never cease to work hard to give their children the best they can and make them good humans.
So whatever age we are, keeping in mind some simple things will always keep us good and grounded:
1. Make your parents proud, always: In a society like ours, every action of ours is linked back to our parents and the sanskar they have given us. Every good deed we do, every award we win, every success of ours will make our parents a thousand times more happy and proud than we feel at that moment. Similarly, every wrongdoing of ours can reflect poorly on them. Of course, they will stand by us and support us even when we have outdone ourselves when it comes to going against morals - because that is what parents do. But let us not take that for granted. It breaks their hearts when we ignore all the good they have done for us, taught us and instead act otherwise. Do we really want to be the cause of heartache for our parents?
2. Communicate: Our parents are our first best friends. And then teenage hits. Suddenly, fathers no longer seem like the supermen we imagined them to be and our mothers take backseats in our lives. Our parents become people who live with us, feed us and give us money. Well, we can blame puberty for that. But breaking the thread of communication with the only people you can be sure will always mean your good, creates rift that can be hard to fill when we become adults. No matter how trivial, they will always be interested in knowing every little detail of your life. So share your thoughts, troubles, feelings, experiences with them - whatever age you are - and you may find you have your best friends back.
3. Listen: Friendship is not a one way road. Hence, communication should not be one sided too. Your parents might have their share of troubles too - be it something at work, health related or even little things about how the maid is always late and how they believe they are always short on milk. So listen to them. Shut down the TV, put aside your mobile, make a nice cup of tea for them or take them out for coffee and make them talk. You will feel more comfortable sharing your thoughts with them when you see them baring their hearts to you.
Facebook messages posted on Mother's Day and Father's Day is a sweet gesture, but showing your love and respect for them in the littlest manner will mean the world to them. Be your own fruit, but always remember and honour the tree that you came from.
