Where's the fun in that?

Office sucks. If yours doesn't, then you are probably demented, or the boss (which is essentially the same thing). But even though your job is underpaid, you are over - timing everyday and the boss thinks you are under - utilised, paychecks don't come on time, it is ensured that you are made to work on weekends, you get work mail at odd hours.. umm... where was I before I went on my ranting spree? Yes, even though offices sucks, if you are even remotely the kind of person it takes to have fun, office spaces become playgrounds which offer oodles of masti (there is no word in the language of firangs which does justice to the cool sentiments of this desi word). How you may ask? Even if you don't, I'm gonna spill the beans anyway because you would have figured out by now what the blog post is about.

This is my second job so far and at each place I have had and am still having a wonderful wonderful time! And being the reserved person that I can be if I choose to be, that is saying something. And trust me, you don't even have to be cool like me to have fun at your office. Are you questioning where's the fun there? Well, then, it is right here:

1. Gossip: It just had to be the number 1 fun activity. And if you are a woman, then it steals the top 10 spots. The 'subject of discussion' can range from shoes to shoulder bags, from clutchers to clothes, from attitude to behaviour to style of speaking to not speaking to you name it! Where there is a will, there is an issue to gossip about! Every organisation has characters which deserve dedicated gossip sessions. And if there are more than one, then the lunch hour is bound to be a long one.

2. Lunch: While we are on the subject of lunch hour, I'll like to confess that my working hours are neatly divided into 3 slots: Before lunch, lunch and after lunch. And no prizes for guessing which of them is the most awaited and loved. If cultivated affectionately and with dedication, lunch hour can spice up, quite literally, your time at the office. Ooh, the fight over the kadhai paneer, and drooling over kadhi rice, and the amazing chana masala with tiffin full of halwa and poori in navaratra's and keeping an eye on that rare sweet in someone's lunch box's hidden corner... I'm salivating already! If you have a lunch group, then its a plus! Then there are days when you go out to eat. Fighting over where to go, yelling at people to wrap up their work, deciding what to eat and all of this in just the lunch hour! And I haven't even started talking of eating yet! Oh, its 1 PM! Sorry, time for my lunch break. Punctuality is a must! :P

3. Lookin' good!: Just imagine for once that you do not have any office to go to. What would your day be like? You obviously can't go shopping everyday (remember, no office = no salary = no extra cash to splurge), you can't meet your friends (they'll be at work) and there is nothing besides household work to do. I'm sure no one will be a big fan of that. So you just stay home and don't even bother to get out of your pyjamas.On the other hand, you pick a random outfit to wear at the office, and because you woke up earlier than usual, you match your accessories with it. And when you reach office, unexpectedly, your colleagues compliment you. If even a couple of compliments on a regular day can lift up your spirits, then just imagine that if you put a little bit of effort to look smarter, how good it will make you feel. And not just because of the compliments. Because dressing well is known to make moods better. There are studies on the net to prove it. Office gives you an opportunity to wear all those clothes and stuff you shopped for! Otherwise, who'll bother if you are all decked up at home with your kids (who'll end up dirtying you anyway) or in - laws/ parents (for whom you won't bother to dress up anyway).



4. B*tching: I could have clubbed it with 'Gossip' but I did not because it deserves its own space. Wherever there is a group of more than 2 people at a workplace, there is bound to be some bitching. But if done moderately, it is not a bad thing. It, I have discovered, can act as a stress reliever. When stuck in a project, just discuss how XYZ girl was acting all 'girly' in from of ABC guy to get his attention, and voila! You feel rejuvenated! And, its benefits are not just limited to that. It also helps people bond which is a great team building exercise! Especially when you together 'talk' about the boss. Letting go of all that pent up frustration is blissful! I just hope my boss doesn't read it. :P Well, the point is, that bitching at work about work, colleagues, boss, even the office boys, canteen operator or the courier guy is fun. And I bet you knew that anyway.


5. Friends: If you are lucky like I have been, and you make wonderful wonderful friends at work, then your workplace can be a playground if you want! I have shared not just work ideas but clothes; not just suggestions on projects, but life and love, not just brainstormed aggressively on new pitches but also on the next party plan. There are bound to be times when you feel low or frustrated or plain bored. And having friends at work is blissful at this time. They help you vent. And motivate you and when they realise that you don't need motivation and just need to b*tch, they'll totally pitch in too.

There are tens of other things which make office suck a lot less. But I'll leave you to find them out by yourself. And when you do, you'll maybe feel a tad bit better about the place where you spend most of your waking hours. Happy working! :)

Blessed

I have a blessed life. In fact,many of us do. You might disagree (rather roll your eyes and say that I know nothing about your life, like I might have done had you made a similar remark) and quote examples to prove how unfortunate your life is. Your gym instructor told you that you are 16 kgs overweight. You scored just 45% in your finals and your parents might ground you for a month. You broke up with your girlfriend or boyfriend of long time and are miserable. Even worse you have a highly complicated love life which will take a couple of hours to explain convincingly to a second person. Or maybe there is nothing special in your life. Just regular, boring stuff. Tragic, eh? Or you might even question me calling my life blessed citing examples that my 'working' hours have increased to 18 hours a day what with the shopping and chopping and ironing and dusting and cooking and cleaning, things I hardly ever did before I married. 

And if I already know the things that might be making your life hell, how can I even call your life blessed? Or for that matter mine? Maybe because we aren't in an abusive relationship. Maybe because we weren't brutally assaulted and left to die at a tender age. Maybe because we didn't lose a loved one. 

Even though we all have hundreds of tensions which are making our life miserable, if we have even one person to listen to our problems, we are blessed. Even though we might not have the body we have always dreamt of having, we are blessed that all our organs and limbs work okay. Even though there might be reasons to be sad and depressed, if we smile even once in a day, we are blessed. Even though our life is not extraordinary, but even if we have one moment which is special and joyful, we are blessed. 

Life sucks! It does. (If you disagree, this post wasn't for you, sorry). But then we have a chance at it and people to share it with and reasons to laugh and enjoy and smile. And that is what makes it blessed. Just focus on the good moments. Despite the increased workload  at the end of the day I have someone to share my petty and not - so - petty problems with and someone to snuggle up to at night. I am blessed. 

:)

My 7 Vows

It is official!


Invitations are being sent out. Senseless amount of money has been spent on clothes, make up, shoes, gifts and a million other things. We have decided to take this life turning plunge and declare ourselves as man and wife in a full-on wedding ceremony in front of some 1000 odd people decked up in stuff we both won't wear ever again. All my female stuff would become commonplace in your wardrobe, bathroom, cabinets, dressing table. My PMSing, mood swings, anger fits, quiet spells, mad urges to sing and many other faces which you have just glimpsed so far would become a part of your daily routine. Scared yet rookie? Well, don't be because the lucky man that you are, I have decided to be a tolerable, fair and understanding room and life partner for our benefit. How so, you ask? The pundit will do his job and make us throw stuff in the holy fire and repeat unintelligible stuff and declare that we have taken the required vows to be married. Vows which we might not understand in the first place to ensure that we follow them. So, I present my own set of vows here. I am no saint and I can deviate from my words. But you'll always have this typed proof on my blog to knock some sense into me when required. So here goes:

1. I hate toothpaste tubes being squeezed from the centre. I hate wet towels on the bed. I hate it when things are not where they are supposed to be. But I vow to remember that my opinion and likings are mine and not yours. I might suggest. But I won't impose.

2. Sometimes I just like to go to a cafe alone and read a book. Just like I have my solitary likes, I'll respect your time with yourself. I promise not to assume time keeper duties. And also not to tag along where you might not want me. Just drop me a hint.
3. I have the entire day planned out and you get called to work. Of course I'll be upset and disappointed. I'm human, and that too female of the species after all. But I promise to be understanding and reasonable. It takes time to kick in. Just bear with me till the time it does.
4. Nobody likes being lied to. Neither do I. I promise to never hurt you with lies and I will trust you no matter what.

5. Jo tera hai wo mera hai. And I just don't mean the good stuff. I might not be able to solve all your problems and tensions, god forbid you have any. But I will stand with you, support you, help you and maybe just listen if that would make you feel better, through thick and thin. And yes, head massages and back rubs are included in the offer. 
6. Women are complicated creatures. They say one thing and mean a score other things. And I don't claim to be much different. As much as I'd want you to read my mind on several occasions, I understand its not possible for you to always know that I'm in the mood for Italian and not south Indian food. Or that I want to spend some 'us' time rather than go out with friends. Or that I want to go watch a movie instead of sitting home. So I promise to not complicate things by assuming. I'll say what I mean and mean what I say.

7. This one is cliché. But touché as well. I promise to love you always. Just the way you are. I might forget to say it everyday, or might deliberately not say it when I'm pissed. But whether we are fighting, or just tired, or too busy to say it, I'll still mean it. I love you. And that shall never change.

And there go my 7 vows.

I would be lying if I say that I won't have expectations, because of course I will. But there shall be no pressure on you.

A very happy married life love. All the best and good luck. God knows you'll need it.

:*

Hopeless India

We all know India is failing. Oh, we have big bombs and planes and tanks and arms and new policies coming up everyday. But a heinous, unpardonable, disturbing and disgusting case showed India the mirror. The reflection today is dirty and bloodied. We also know the flaws. We all would have atleast one solution to the problems. But we all would have heard counter statements on how those solutions won't work because of some other flaw which we might have overlooked. Some say the mindsets and morals of 125 crore people can't change overnight. Some say the 35 lakh police people can't be taught the right way to deal with a crime anytime soon. Some say the foundation of the country's politics is so weak with corruption that any superficial change for the better would crash down. We are nation of people who are scared to help an accident victim fearing the police's rash investigation or rather lack of it. We are a democracy where the people in power promise but never deliver. So where do we start this change from? Us? Government? Police? Bribe takers? Bribe givers? Is a change ever possible when we know that those responsible to drive the change will either be corrupt or will be made helpless by the other corrupt people in power?

The girl's brutal rape case woke up the country's masses. She lit a flame. Which will invariably die soon. The story will shift from the front to the internal pages of the papers. Some sports tournament or celebrity controversy or the governing and opposition party's latest tiff will distract the electronic media. We'll have a friend's wedding or the weather or a new hobby to talk about on FaceBook and Twitter. And the corruption, which has infested our system to such an extent that there is absolutely no part of our lives untouched by it, will continue as always.
I'm sorry to the girl whose tragic case was riddled with corruption and scandals and politics and incapability of police, to the people who protested, to those who are still positive that change will happen; but the flame will die. And we won't be able to do much about it except express our anger and dissatisfaction, face the water cannons, lathi charge and tear gas.

I have given up hope. The golden sparrow is dead. Bharat mata is being raped everyday by her own people. I'm not a proud Indian.

Whats sets us apart

We might not be a clean and green country with a robust economy but India has one thing that sets us apart from the rest of the globe. We have a unique character. Brits are snobs. Americans are jolly. Australians are shrewd. Africans are...well... black. But Indians- the word which does justice to us is, unpredictable.

Despite years of trying to look suave and cool like the west, India's image is still that of an eccentric, poor and culture rich country. Just like our nation, we all try to fit in somewhere. We try so hard to blend in our new office, neighbourhood, in - laws family, even in a fancy restaurant we are paying to eat at. Sometimes we succeed too. But mostly we just end up feeling uncomfortable and someone we are not. So why try so hard to pretend when the characteristic we are trying most hard to hide is the one which sets us apart.

For those who follow the hit TV series, How I Met Your Mother, it might not be unbelievable that my favourite is Barney Stintson's. His character is a heady mix of a womaniser (understated) and a romantic who'll do anything to keep his beloved happy. Despite being rich, suit clad 24*7 and legen-wait for it-dary, his character is easy to hate with the way he objectifies women but irresistible for his unconditional love for his friends. I could guess the characterisation of the rest of the characters in the first episode but Barney surprised me in each season. That is what set him apart.

No, I'm not paid to do PR for HIMYM. The point I want to make is, different is good. Trying to make ourselves into someone acceptable and likable won't work for long. If we are different, let people categorise us as that. Which would be better than being thought about as a person we are not and have to work hard to be.

Save the disguises for the theatre. Being yourself is in! And that is what will set us apart.

But you are too young to be married!

I'm 23. I'm engaged.

And it seems like the most drastic thing that a 23 years old could be.

When the news got out, before being congratulated on having landed a talented and handsome young man, most of my well wishers asked, so soon? But you are so young! Why the hurry?

Its funny that I was never told you are too young for this when I won the lead actress award for a school theatre in second grade. No one asked what the hurry was when I read my first Shakespeare at age 7. Why was I not asked in surprised tones why I had to choreograph my parents' 25th anniversary programme when I was at a young and impressionable age of 15. I wasn't questioned about being too young to be a leading news channel's youngest anchor at 21 years of age. No one raises an eyebrow at the fact that at 23 years I'm as (if not more) qualified and in a better income bracket than their son of 30 years! So if I wasn't too young to be all the above, why am I too young to be married?

So when relatives, family, friends, colleagues or even random people sound more surprised than happy at the news,(What?! You are getting married! So soon?? Why?! I can't believe you are already engaged at 23! Oh anyway, congratulations) I fail to see the 'big deal' in the entire issue.

And for those, who keep asking me why so soon, the reason, my dears is love. And if that isn't reason enough for you, then to each her own.

P.S. I'll rather have my fun when I'm young and excited about it than waiting for the appropriate age. :P

Unachievables

We have all had that one thing which we wanted with all our heart and soul but certain situations or conditions rendered them unachievable. It is common occurence for the unachievable to be a person. Something or someone we have always fantasised about or wanted to call our own. The pursuit of the unachievable brings out the romantic, the poet and the dreamer in us. We are so engrossed in trying to achieve the unachievable that we never give much attention to how the desired object fits into our life. And when I say object, I mean both the living and the non - living because in our efforts to win the target, fuelled by mindless passion, even though unintentionally, we become a little selfish and end up disregarding the feelings and needs of the prize we have set our eyes on.

In our minds, the race to win becomes an unending process, the end of which we don't give much thought to. When maybe just by coincidence or maybe owing to our incessant efforts or maybe because of a little bit of both, we achieve the unachievable, our joy has no bounds. I'm sure you know where I'm heading. But I'll continue anyway. The rejoice is often short lived because after we are done admiring our achievement, we might be at a loss of words when we ask ourselves 'what next' or when we begin to think 'this doesn't feel right'. This moment maybe delayed but it will come. One day or the other. The romantic in you will never acknowledge it but there will be no getting away from it.

But it shouldn't keep you from wanting, desiring and aiming. Because whether we have realised it or not, we all live for the race. We all need a dream which becomes a purpose towards which all our efforts are aimed. It is just important to remember always the feeling we had when we first made the unachievable our life's goal which will help us keep its importance fresh in our minds. And to find a new unachievable. But it shouldn't conflict with your achieved unachievables.

The world is full of possibilities and impossibilities. Never stop dreaming. Never stop cherishing the dream you turned into reality.